The invisibles

I read on someones blog about the invisible wife…

that’s how I feel this week… no matter what I do, in fact everything I do .. I am invisible…

I cook.. yet there is a huge mess left… and even though I did the dishes, no body can mange to put their own cup away… I am invisible… I do it again…

I wash.. yet it doesn’t ever stop… I do an average of 4 loads of laundry a day, yet it is rare that I ever see my floor… I am invisible.. clean clothes come from heaven, don’t they?

I change bedding… everyones… I clean the bathroom… yet to find everything messed up in a matter of minutes… diapers… don’t even get me started.. I’m just happy we’re down to one in diapers and it’s not cloth anymore…

the garbage only goes out if I complain or take it out myself, the diaper garbage.. the bag falls off the rim and nobody else can manage to pick it up, so usually I’m wearing gloves to reload the bag and empty the bucket… (we have a separate garbage b/c it’s non burnable/recyclable… oh i love the farm…)..

I sweep the floor, I vacuum the floor, I scrub the floor…

the only vacation I’ve had was in 1994 when Miss H was 11 months.

I’m really tired. Everyone is still sick; I’m sick, but that doesn’t matter… I’m invisible..

Everyone complains that they aren’t getting something, and the mess is created even bigger b/c they don’t put it away so the baby destroys it or tries to eat it.

Sleep… everyone is sleeping and I’m trying to put some order back into the chaos b/c if I don’t it gets so bad that no one can move…. I am invisible.. little magic elfs come and clean at night, don’t they?

Food magically appears in the fridge, in the pantry…

I am alone 90% of the time with the kids unless you count church, which I spent the time going from nursery to nursery dropping of each child and miss half of the service… if I do sit in the service I’m so uncomfortable b/c my clothes are messed up from spit, snot, or other bodily fluids that I’m not able to identify… Adult conversation is rare…

I am a mother of 4 under 5. I am invisible.

If you’ve lasted this long. Thanks for listening to my rant.

I do love my job.

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16 responses to “The invisibles

  1. I do believe every mommie understands this rant and have on many an occasion said it. It helps to get it out. Healing may now begin.

  2. I understand and I had that posted on my blog. I can find the link if you want to link or copy it.

    Oh yeah, I forgot to use my new button yesterday. Oops. I forgot until I just saw yours! lol

  3. Amy, thanks for visiting my blog and your encouragement. Thank God for giving you grace, strength and joy to serve Him at home. It is indeed not easy and a very high calling!

    Your labours of love has not gone unnoticed 🙂 The Lord will bless your labours and continue to make you a blessing to your family and others who come into contact with you. May His joy continue to be your strength always. And Thanks for sharing Psalms 5:1-3. These verses are very encouraging. Thank God we can look to Him daily and find strength and joy to live for Him and serve Him wherever He places us.

    Have a blessed week!

  4. {Hugs}… Because there isn’t anything else to say.
    Only another wife/mother gets this…

  5. Oh I could have written this post, I have been known to begin talking to myself out loud because I felt no one was listening. Oh I have been there (in fact yesterday ;). Hugs.

  6. Thank you for sharing your funny/sad rant with us… the invisible army. It’s so true that what you do every day is undone before you can start again. I am reminded of a trip to a lighthouse, where the curator told us that the lighthousekeepers have to start painting at one end of the house, and keep going around it, year round, because by the time they finish the whole thing, it’s weatherbeaten on the first side again. You are a lighthouse keeper of the most important kind! Love, Miriam

  7. I love to hear you rant!! It makes me feel oh so not alone!!!! 😉

  8. I think any mother can certainly relate to this post…. I know I can. We all love our job as mommy, but it doesn’t come without difficult and exhausting moments. Whenever I am going thru these times, I try to remember what my mother has told me many times.
    The Lord has blessed me and seen fit to give me the wonderful responsibility of raising and loving my children. And, though it may be downright awful some days, we are raising these precious children of God to go out into the world to be responsible, loving, God-serving people in this big ‘ole world. Somehow that always makes it a little easier for me to go about the exhausting moments of being a mommy.

    Praying for you to get some rest and some time alone/with other adults. Big Hugs!!

  9. Hi, Amy…. it’s me again. As I hit ‘submit’ on my above comment I remembered an email my mother sent me about 6 months ago. By the time I finished I was in tears, but at the same time felt almost privileged to be invisible. I was able to find it on the web… here’s the link:

    http://creativeoutletdesigns.blogspot.com/2007/09/invisible-mom.html

  10. (((((HUGS)))))

    Amy, you tell the truth in your post. And it is beautifully written too. I think all wives and especially mothers can relate. Some days feel worse than others. I have felt like this so often too.

    When my husband was sent out of town for an extended period of time, I realized that he too had been invisible. It wasn’t until he was gone and I became aware of all the work that he did because now I had to do it, that I realized he did plenty around the house, just not the same things that I was doing. Things like fixing the screens, caulking the windows in the winter to prevent having to go out in the middle of a rainstorm, spraying all around the house for bugs, the list went on and on. I became aware that all these things were usually being done by my husband, I just never saw how much work he did because I was busy doing all the laundry, dishes, cleaning, cooking, etc., etc., etc.

    You are both very important and needed for your children, the house and your marriage. Even your children play an important role. For as much work, headache and heartache as children can cause, they also give us love, laughs, pride, etc.

    (((HUGS))) Never forget you are loved.

  11. Hey Amy, I totally understand, but although my kitchen remains in disarray, and the laundry piles would challenge the mountain climbing prowess of the Von Trapp family, nevertheless, I can say to you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I once was the mother of 3 children under 2.5- the’re now 11, 12 & 13, so we are in a different phase of life. We now deal with hormones and friendship disputes, but I am happy to report I am no longer covered with snot or any other such delicacies!
    Although it seems endless, all of a sudden, you’ll turn round, and your darlings will be in senior school, soon to leave home, and you’ll wonder where all that time went. Enjoy your time at home, grab a cup of tea and a kid to cuddle, and take heart that all of our kitchens are a fright at times, too!
    Wishing you many blessings,
    Juliet. x x

  12. Like many others, I can completely relate to your rant. The first time I chose to be a SAHM, I wound up going back to work. I just couldn’t handle it and desperately needed to get out of the house. I have since returned, by choice, to staying home and really enjoy it, except for the cloak of invisibility.

  13. Oh, Amy – I send hugs! All I can say is that it does get better – they grow up and help out…then they become teenagers…lol! My five are a blast!

    Sounds like you need a vacation – to maybe……Kansas??

    I love you, hang in there. Like has been said, you are doing the most wonderful work a person can do, raising your children in a Godly home!

  14. May God be your strength. May He reward your efforts, and may He give you rest and refreshment even as you meet the needs of others.

  15. Oh the years of the children being young. We are told we will miss them one day and yet when we are in the midst of them they can feel so hard, so long. We have never in our life worked so hard to get so little done. It is beautiful to know that to Christ you are not invisible and he sees every hard moment. Then just at the right moment when we feel we can not make it another moment those littles do just one more thing that makes us smile and again we keep going. It is a funny balance we moms live and love in. You are very understood from another mom of 4. Mine are getting a little older now, no more diapers (although I do still have a night time wetter). They all sleep though the night…I am a bit more rested but there still seems to be so much to still do on each day. When I brought home my 4th child I had 2 other friends who already had 4. Both said the same thing to me on separate occasions. …..That was give it 8
    years then it will all settle down. To me 8 years from my youngest birth felt like an eternity and yet it is now hear and yes it has setttled into it’s own routine but it is still a work in progress that I daily need God’s help with….I am doing it and you are doing it also!

  16. Oh the years of the children being young. We are told we will miss them one day and yet when we are in the midst of them they can feel so hard, so long. We have never in our life worked so hard to get so little done. It is beautiful to know that to Christ you are not invisible and he sees every hard moment. Then just at the right moment when we feel we can not make it another moment those littles do just one more thing that makes us smile and again we keep going. It is a funny balance we moms live and love in. You are very understood from another mom of 4. Mine are getting a little older now, no more diapers (although I do still have a night time wetter). They all sleep though the night…I am a bit more rested but there still seems to be so much to still do on each day. When I brought home my 4th child I had 2 other friends who already had 4. Both said the same thing to me on separate occasions. …..That was give it 8
    years then it will all settle down. To me 8 years from my youngest birth felt like an eternity and yet it is now hear and yes it has setttled into it’s own routine but it is still a work in progress that I daily need God’s help with….I am doing it and you are doing it also!

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